“Growth happens when you start doing the things you are not qualified to do.” - Steven Bartlett, The Diary of a CEO
Putting ourselves in situations where we don’t feel comfortable is really not something most of us do well.
From a pretty young age I became acutely aware of the fact that I go red in the face when I’m embarrassed. I would always get flushed whenever I would get asked a question in class or had to stand up and deliver a presentation. I always felt really uncomfortable in those situations.
This continued all the way through school, into University and into the first couple of jobs I had. But at one point along the way, I made a conscious decision to keep putting myself in the situations where I was presenting to groups of people. I remember telling myself that if I wanted to be good at presenting, I just had to do more of it.
Over time, I think my ability to present and talk to large groups has dramatically improved. Even to the point where I now quite enjoy it.
I always feel that twinge of anxiety and trepidation about doing it, but once I start talking and gain composure, I feel comfortable.
Choosing the challenge gave me the room to grow and develop my capability in presenting and talking to groups. It is by no means a challenge I have completed but one that I now actively and openly embrace.
I enjoy finding things that push me outside my comfort zone. Sometimes I don’t realise that I’ve found a growth opportunity until I’m in one.
I typically feel anxious and start ruminating about all the things that could go right or could go wrong. In that moment I consciously choose to acknowledge the discomfort, knowing that eventually I’ll see the benefits of growth and not feel like an imposter in the situation I am in.
Imposter syndrome was something I felt for quite a long period of time throughout my career. I often felt like I would get found out for not really knowing something and constantly felt like I was finding people who were better than me or that knew more about my job than I did. But then when I had my second child, I really started to listen to what I had been telling myself for a very long time about my own parents. “Nobody knows what they are really doing, they are just making the best decisions with the information that they currently have”.
Since that realisation, I’ve applied this to all areas of my life and career. Everyone is doing the best they can, with the information they know and the experiences they’ve had. Everything is uncomfortable to start with and we do the best we can under the circumstances, until we gain the experience and knowledge about how to deal with that situation better.
Realising we are all working through our own lives together and that we should be kinder to ourselves and kind to the people around us has been really liberating.
“The biggest difference between successful people and unsuccessful people is that successful people are willing to do what unsuccessful people aren’t” - Darren Hardy, The Compound Effect
I challenge you to do the one thing that you have been putting off that gives you that little bit of anxiety and dread, and embrace that discomfort as the first step towards growth. Be kind to yourself and you will be successful!
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